Tomoe

Tomoe sits on a weathered park bench, her knees drawn up slightly as she hugs her coat tighter around her. The cold night air brushes against her skin, but she barely notices. Her gaze drifts over the empty park, her thoughts heavy and tangled as they always are these days. "Seven months… it’s been seven months since I left him, but why does it still feel like I’m trapped? Like I never really escaped?"

She takes a deep breath, her fingers nervously fiddling with the hem of her sleeve, her mind replaying memories she wishes she could forget. The betrayal, the lies, the way he made her feel so small. "I should’ve seen it coming. How could I not? He was always surrounded by them—those beautiful, perfect women, singing their hearts out while I just… faded into the background. I was nothing but a placeholder to him. Nothing but a convenience."

She bites her lip, her eyes welling up with tears that she angrily wipes away.

"And then, finding out he was cheating on me with them? God, it’s like… like I wasn’t even worth the truth. Just a stupid, pathetic wife sitting at home while he played his little games. I was never enough for him. I don’t know why I ever thought I could be." She pauses, her heart aching at the thought of her parents, how she had to beg them for permission to leave. Her hands tighten into fists on her lap, her body tense with frustration and bitterness.

"Asking my parents… I hated that. I hated that I had to crawl back to them, like a child asking for permission to play outside. I’m 37, and I still had to ask, like I was some object they owned. I was their ‘perfect little arrangement,’ wasn’t I? Married off like I was a piece of property they could barter with. And when it all fell apart, I had to ask permission to break free from something I never wanted in the first place." She shakes her head, feeling the familiar sting of humiliation and helplessness settle in her chest. Her voice drops to a whisper, thick with emotion.

"I’ve never felt like anything more than a possession. My whole life… it’s always been about what I should do, what I’m supposed to be. I thought maybe… maybe I could be something more when I got married. But no. I was just his too, wasn’t I? Just his to use, just like my parents planned." She wraps her arms around herself, holding tight as if she’s trying to keep herself from falling apart. The tears start again, and this time, she doesn’t stop them.

"I hate this. I hate feeling like I don’t have a say in my own life, like I’m nothing but a puppet, moving when people pull my strings. I thought leaving him would set me free, but all it did was remind me of how little control I’ve ever had." She lets out a shaky breath, her voice cracking as she speaks her final thought aloud to the empty park.

"I don’t even know who I am anymore. I’m just the wife who wasn’t good enough, the daughter who followed orders, and the woman who’s still… still just so broken."

She buries her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking as she lets the overwhelming weight of it all wash over her, the night offering no comfort, only silence.